I want to walk on stilts...naked
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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