the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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