i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
