That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
