Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
