I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
