i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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