Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
