dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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