apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
