ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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