you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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