Where did you get a picture of my penis
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
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