I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
My vagina just recognized that song.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
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