Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
