Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
