Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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