I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
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