I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Randomize
