You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Randomize
