i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
