My girlfriend figured out who you are.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
