Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
