You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Randomize
