Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize