i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
