Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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