I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
