farters have to be the big spoon...
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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