I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
