Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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