even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
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