I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
