your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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