it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
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