First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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