But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
We're too hungover to prance.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
