so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Can I color on your dick again?
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize