wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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