I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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