We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize