your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
our cab driver is having phone sex.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
