saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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