If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
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