I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
