Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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