Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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