He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Randomize
