So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
