what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize