I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
